Internal Monologue

So, I’m on page 310. 50 or so odd pages to go, maybe less, depending on the story. And the closer I get to that ending, the more neurotic I become. This is a bit of what happened last night.

Me: (opening the file, staring at the screen). You really ought to just start writing, you know. After all, you know what happens next.
Me #2: But what if I don’t get it right? What if it all collides into this big horrible mess and no one in their right mind will want to read it unless they’re under the influence?
Me: Just start typing. You can do this.
Me #2: Maybe if I get 3 pages, I can watch American Idol. Okay, then (starts writing).
Me: Um, Michelle, you shouldn’t be checking the Internet right now. Focus! Write!
Me #2: Oh, yeah. Bad Michelle! Stop reading blogs. Get OFF the Internet. Let’s see, 1.7 pages written…
Me: You are so pitiful. How can you call yourself an author?
Me #2: Well, if I get this book ending wrong, I WON’T be able to call myself an author any more.
Me: Do I need to bust out the whoopin’ stick? Quit being neurotic and just WRITE the story.
Me #2: All right, all right…

The end total of pages last night was 4. Not great, but I did get to watch American Idol. Can’t say I was all that surprised that Hayley (sp.?) got voted off. She has a nice voice, but there’s not as much power as the other folks. I still like Blake. He’s one of my favorites.

Tonight’s goal: Reach page 314. And hopefully try not to spaz about it…