The Results

So, the teacher conference went well. My son knows his numbers and letters. There were some weird things he didn’t know. Like the color tan. Um, okay. Didn’t realize that was a more important color than beige or peach. I can see it now. Color remediation classes.

Me: “What color is that, sweetie?”
Him: “White.”
Me: “No, darling child, that is eggshell. Now let’s practice ecru and periwinkle.”

Let’s be real. Most people really don’t care. I love that advertisement where the boyfriend is dragged shoe shopping and the girl asks for his opinion on black heels. To him, they all look alike. I can see my boy being the same way.

The other thing he didn’t know was where his ankles or heels were. So we’ll have to do a little more body part labeling. Point to your clavicle! Now your spine! Yes, that’s right. Shake that gluteus maximus. :headspin:

I’m glad so many of you enjoyed my theme song. I think I may add to the lyrics and see if I can’t get a complete version.

In publishing news, two agents declined. One said the historical market was too tight and I might want to try another genre. The other invited me to send something else. Ah well, I sent out another query yesterday.

Enjoy your weekend!

Parent-Teacher Conferences

Today I have a conference with my son’s preschool teacher. I don’t anticipate anything major, but it’ll be interesting to see how he is in relation to the other kids. I’m betting that she’ll say he doesn’t participate in music/movement. In other words, the boy can’t dance.

Gee, guess where he inherited that one? I love to dance, but I’ll freely admit I’m not good at it. So it’s no surprise that my boy can’t quite get his groove on. Besides, how easy is it to dance to the Wiggles or Sesame Street? Yeah, not so much. He does better with Technotronic.

She’ll probably also say that he needs practice with scissors. I’m not touching that one. I know that when I was his age, I cut most of my brother’s hair off because I was “practicing” with scissors. I have no intention of giving him ideas. He uses scissors at preschool, and as far as I’m concerned, that’ll do fine.

Now my daughter’s conference on Monday will be another story. When my son was her age, he knew his colors, shapes, and alphabet. My daughter can count to twenty and sing the ABC’s, but everything is purple. I’ve never heard her recite a shape either. I’m not too stressed about it because I know kids catch up at their own rate. Still, I have a feeling her little report card won’t be too good. Yes, teachers are neurotic about such things.

On the writing front, I’m still waiting. I will confess that I am GREEN with envy :worthy:for the people who get The Call after three weeks. Or even three months! I alternate between phases of elation–no news must mean good news!–and periods of –Oh-geez-why-don’t-they-just-reject-me-and-get-it-over-with. I think my current song must be Gloria Gaynor’s “I Will Survive.” (words slightly modified) Feel free to sing along.

At first I was afraid, I was so forlorn
Kept thinkin’ my book would come back with a rejection form
And now I’ve spent so many nights
Thinkin’ what is going on?
Is my book stuck upon a desk
Or is it absolutely gone?
Don’t send it back!
Don’t want it here!
Come on now call me now, my phone is pressed
Right up to my ear.
I want to hear the editor’s voice
Saying that she wants my book,
Or else I’ll crumble…
Yes, I’ll lay down and die,
I won’t survive!

Fish Butcher Strikes Again

ANOTHER fish just died. What is with the Tank of Death??? I even put some Ammonia Lock in there and some Rid-Ick medicine. I have a secret theory. Perhaps the fish are part of a Death cult, you know like the Jonestown Kool-Aid party? One by one, they sacrifice themselves to that Great Toilet Bowl in the Sky. Good grief! The Tetra is belly-up and the male guppy is struggling to breathe. Not good.

In other news, my friend Tori was talking about her writer’s horoscpe for March. Just for kicks, I looked mine up. Now I am not at all a superstitious person, and I view horoscopes like I do the comic strips. Fun to read. Here was mine:

Libra: The perfect year to polish that manuscript or screenplay and get it out there. Two significant planets are perfectly positioned for writers..lucky you! Smart you, actually. You have the BEST chart of anyone to make this writing thing pay off well.

Now, call me crazy, but I am CHOOSING to believe that one.

In other news, I was interviewed by the Virginia Pilot newspaper last Saturday. They had come to our chapter meeting to meet romance writers and speak with us about publishing. If/when the article comes out, I’ll link to it so you can see what they had to say. What was strange about it, was the tv camera. I don’t know if they are planning a special feature on the news or what, but I had fun. A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far, away, :starwars: I used to produce my high school television show. Let me just say, I was having serious flashbacks. But it was fun. I don’t mind media.

I am almost done with my revisions on the Book-That-Darn-Near-Killed-Me. I should be finished by Saturday (please hold me to that) and then it’s onto something new.

Yesterday I was roofing. Yes, you heard me correctly. Roofing! I was about 15-20 feet up from the ground, balanced on the roof of the shed, hammering shingles. I even wore a tool belt. There’s something satisfying about pounding nails and watching something come together.

What’s the most interesting home improvement job you’ve worked on?

Seeking an Agent

I’ll admit, I’m having way too much fun. As many of you know, I am on the Quest for the Perfect Agent ™. About a year ago, when I first embarked on this scavenger hunt for the Holy Grail, I was discouraged by the 5-6 rejections I received. Two agents requested the full manuscript, and both encouraged me to send them other books when the first one didn’t quite fly. I did, and one of the agents sent it right back with a form rejection. Ouch. The other one–let’s just say I never sent the book because our phone conversation was a little too pushy for my tastes. We wouldn’t have suited so I decided not to waste her time.

Courtesy of Secret Agent Miss Snark (whose blog is quite a hoot if you’ve never read her–I suspect most of you have), she advises all authors to query no less than 100 agents before giving up. Why? Because the reasons for rejection, in many cases, have absolutely nothing to do with the writing. I’m already starting to see how this is true.

While I’m nowhere near 100 queries, I’ve mailed out approximately 15 packages and about 5 electronic proposals or queries. Some have written back nice notes explaining that while they liked the writing, historical romance wasn’t their thing. I’m so grateful for notes like that because it saves me querying them again. I need someone who adores historical romance, someone who slurps it up like expensive champagne. If the agent views historical romance with a “Meh” attitude, we won’t suit, because I’m an ambitious kind of girl.

On the bright side, I’m changing the terminology. I don’t call them agent rejections. I call them “Declines.” Because that’s what they’re doing–declining to represent me for various reasons. In any case, I’m hoping to find the right person–someone who “gets” me and my warped sense of humor. I decided to be a little bolder in my personal information. Those of you who read my blog know that I am a Fish Butcher (too many aquarium casualties), a teacher of hormonally-crazed twelve-year-olds, and I am constantly prying a toddler off my leg who is demanding my undivided attention. When, “Mommy! Mommy!” doesn’t work, they have been known to throw themselves down the office stairs to get my attention (Okay, so it’s only 4 stairs, but they have a keen sense of drama).

So I’ve decided to add this into my queries. Hey, if you’re an agent and you read in the neighborhood of 300 queries a week, wouldn’t you be more interested in a Fish Butcher than a mild-mannered American History teacher? So anyway, I decided to entertain myself when writing my bio. I may still get rejected, but you never know. It’s kind of fun, I’ll admit. I loooove submitting because I love getting mail.

In other news, it’s Lent. I need 6 vegetarian or seafood recipes to make it through the Fridays. So far I’ve come up with the following: cheese pizza, lobster, baked potato soup, pasta. I desperately need some alternatives. We really aren’t big seafood consumers in my household, but if there’s a kind of fish that doesn’t taste or smell fishy, I might give it a shot. Any suggestions? What are your favorite Lent or vegetarian dishes? (Larissa, come help me here!)