Seeking an Agent

I’ll admit, I’m having way too much fun. As many of you know, I am on the Quest for the Perfect Agent ™. About a year ago, when I first embarked on this scavenger hunt for the Holy Grail, I was discouraged by the 5-6 rejections I received. Two agents requested the full manuscript, and both encouraged me to send them other books when the first one didn’t quite fly. I did, and one of the agents sent it right back with a form rejection. Ouch. The other one–let’s just say I never sent the book because our phone conversation was a little too pushy for my tastes. We wouldn’t have suited so I decided not to waste her time.

Courtesy of Secret Agent Miss Snark (whose blog is quite a hoot if you’ve never read her–I suspect most of you have), she advises all authors to query no less than 100 agents before giving up. Why? Because the reasons for rejection, in many cases, have absolutely nothing to do with the writing. I’m already starting to see how this is true.

While I’m nowhere near 100 queries, I’ve mailed out approximately 15 packages and about 5 electronic proposals or queries. Some have written back nice notes explaining that while they liked the writing, historical romance wasn’t their thing. I’m so grateful for notes like that because it saves me querying them again. I need someone who adores historical romance, someone who slurps it up like expensive champagne. If the agent views historical romance with a “Meh” attitude, we won’t suit, because I’m an ambitious kind of girl.

On the bright side, I’m changing the terminology. I don’t call them agent rejections. I call them “Declines.” Because that’s what they’re doing–declining to represent me for various reasons. In any case, I’m hoping to find the right person–someone who “gets” me and my warped sense of humor. I decided to be a little bolder in my personal information. Those of you who read my blog know that I am a Fish Butcher (too many aquarium casualties), a teacher of hormonally-crazed twelve-year-olds, and I am constantly prying a toddler off my leg who is demanding my undivided attention. When, “Mommy! Mommy!” doesn’t work, they have been known to throw themselves down the office stairs to get my attention (Okay, so it’s only 4 stairs, but they have a keen sense of drama).

So I’ve decided to add this into my queries. Hey, if you’re an agent and you read in the neighborhood of 300 queries a week, wouldn’t you be more interested in a Fish Butcher than a mild-mannered American History teacher? So anyway, I decided to entertain myself when writing my bio. I may still get rejected, but you never know. It’s kind of fun, I’ll admit. I loooove submitting because I love getting mail.

In other news, it’s Lent. I need 6 vegetarian or seafood recipes to make it through the Fridays. So far I’ve come up with the following: cheese pizza, lobster, baked potato soup, pasta. I desperately need some alternatives. We really aren’t big seafood consumers in my household, but if there’s a kind of fish that doesn’t taste or smell fishy, I might give it a shot. Any suggestions? What are your favorite Lent or vegetarian dishes? (Larissa, come help me here!)